Well, we're nearing the end of a very turbulent relationship, filled with as many ups and downs as a roller coaster. It seems as though I was constantly battling something this year-- between Vance, ear infections, sinus infections (which I battled all through Christmas week and am finally getting over it), croup.. needless to say, you weren't my favorite year. Yes, I struggled. A lot. Only now that I look back on the year, it seems as though I had just stopped, my year MIGHT have been totally different. Stopped trying to change Vance, stopped expecting things to happen, things to change, stopped feeling sorry for myself. (It's pretty ironic that the girl who has "Let It Be" tattooed on her wrist was the very one who could not do so)
Frankly, it is a scary and depressing thought that we ultimately choose the outcome of our year-- that it all comes down to a choice, a responsibility for our own misery or happiness. I'm not sorry at all to see 2011 go, and I haven't decided on any concrete resolutions for 2012 like "I'm going to lose 10 pounds this year," so I think for now I'll just decide to choose happiness in 2012.
I already know that 2012 is going to be amazing. I know it will be filled with changes-- big changes-- and I'm excited and ready and ecstatic to see what else is in store. (I promise I will post soon that isn't so cryptic)
What's funny is that in January 2011 I did something extremely unlike "me" and went to see a psychic. I needed insight and have always wanted to see one, so I jumped at the chance when Jess recommended one that she had gone to and liked. Here's what she told me: do not divorce your husband. I was shocked that she had said that and it was one of the first things she said when I sat down. She said the hubs was a good person, a good man who loved me a lot. Then she told me I was mean to him (half true at the time). She said we would have another baby sometime next year -- a boy! -- and she mentioned something about a house. Some parts were really creepy, some were generic and some were totally off. But you take what you can get with a psychic, I guess. She kept saying that she wasn't 'worried' about me, that I had a clean heart, a good heart and that I should continue going to church. What an experience.
And so, 2011 even though I hated you a majority of the time, you weren't all bad. In fact, you were filled with a ton of happy experiences too. Disneyland, beach days, birthday parties and a lot of life lessons that will shape me for the future...
enjoyed backyard fun with my short, dirty-blonde haired girl. miss that hair color already!
the sweetest little Valentine
first time at the beach
a visit from one of my besties and her girls
little sassy pants turns 2
a trip to the bon dance
zoo trips with tiny tots
garage tea parties
celebrating two and a half!